At two years old, Shane Tarkington was diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) at Good Sam Hospital. By then, a child is usually capable of speaking words and communicating in other ways. But Tarkington’s parents recall how their son wasn’t able to do so yet. Plus, he had difficulty with transitioning from one location to another.
“I wasn’t getting what I needed out of the Campbell Union School District. I needed more services. And I needed Shane to be mainstream, and not be in the severe autism classes,” said his mother Maureen Tarkington.
With constant support from his mother, Shane has been able to not only succeed in society amongst peers, he has excelled. At age eight, painting became a method for Tarkington to express what he’s feeling on the inside
Depending on the intensity of the autism, the child may have to switch schools This is what happened with Shane. His mother said he had trouble creating lasting relationships. “To this day, he cannot be around babies, because it brings him anxiety—because of preschool, kindergarten and first grade classes where he was very low-functioning and had major behavioral issues,” she said. When Maureen began homeschooling Shane for 1st grade—then in 2nd and 3rd grades—she felt a major sense of relief, for Shane and herself. That’s because of the freedom they had to change their schedule and area of focus. She considered this a major win.
People on the autism spectrum frequently have a hard time when shifting from one place to the next. When Shane jumped into homeschooling, Maureen said it allowed her to learn what his needs were. “I was taking it year by year. And then I had him reassessed by the school district to see what they could do,” Maureen said. But, she says they rejected her request for a reassessment. Shane returned to Alta Vista Elementary at the start of the fourth grade. He would finish his elementary education there. “Fast friends fourth and fifth grade,” are Maureen’s words for realizing her son was able to develop relationships with other kids at school while she was doing yard duty. Shane’s new friends’ first language was Spanish. The language difference wasn’t a barrier for Shane.
Once it was time for Shane to go into middle school, they got an advocate to help push for Shane to attend Union Middle School over Dartmouth Middle School. “We got into Union and his friends were there,” Maureen said. “I would buy pizza and cupcakes, and I would sit with Shane in the quad. Shane’s new to middle school, so I introduced him to new friends. And I told them, He has autism, and has difficulties, so, maybe you can give him a hand.” Maureen began getting more involved during his time at middle school. If Maureen noticed her son having more difficult days, she would purchase gift cards for teachers and janitors, to express her gratitude. She attended meetings with Shane’s teachers, to ensure Shane would be ready for high school. He got into Leigh High School.
Throughout high school, he turned things around socially and academically with the help of his mom. But also, there was English teacher Mrs. Duffy. By the time Shane had graduated high school, he was crowned Homecoming King. He was even the surprise speaker at his graduation.
Once Maureen had noticed that in order for someone to be nominated for homecoming, they needed to be advocated for. She realized that Shane wouldn’t be able to do that on his own. So, she helped campaign for him at his school. The amount of love that Shane has been showered with seems to radiate onto Maureen. There is a lot of stigma around being on the spectrum, and that’s only exacerbated when support is cut. And people living on the spectrum are cast into the shadows. Similar to Netflix’s series “Love on the Spectrum,” Shane’s story shows the importance of visibility for people with autism. “It’s a spectrum. Some of us are on the spectrum, and some of them are not,” said Shane.
(Faizi Samadani / Los Gatan)
The social and academic victories were a result of persistence. When there was a consideration for Shane to go to a school with less of a specific curriculum for kids on the spectrum, Maureen hired an agent to help fight for her son to be considered for the better-fitting option. By senior year at Leigh, Shane attended English class that was outside of the special needs program. It was taught by Mrs. Duffy. She gave Maureen the assurance that Shane would be taken care of in her class. And also she helped with the drive for Shane to speak at graduation. Maureen had no idea about this plan. And when she witnessed it, she burst into tears of pride and joy. “I want people to know that people can change, and some people can not,” said Shane, adding he appreciates his mom’s role in his life. “I feel like I’m safe.”
Art became a big part of his identity, leading to pop-ups around Los Gatos. He’s even been featured in stores such as The Butter Paddle, Out of the Envelope and Great Bear Coffee. Most of Shane’s work is inspired by nature, though he has a specific knack for drawing Disney princesses—inspired by a yearning for a romantic connection. Shane has grown a following over the years through his website and Instagram page that his mom helped him create. One of his paintings even sold for $1,000. Once Shane is done with a particular work, Maureen turns the image into prints or kitchen items like towels, and has them printed at Out of the Envelope.
Neurodivergence is being talked about more and more these days. Shane’s story—including his mother’s advocacy—raises questions about whether the stigma around people on the spectrum could be rooted in a lack of support and resources. Shane may never be able to live entirely on his own or hold a steady job without the assistance of others. However, he’s living a full life. One that is inspiring others to move past the fear of the unknown.
